Progressive Cleveland

For 20 years, conservative Republicans have told me that Global Warming was nonsense.

Of course the idea that they could be wrong never entered their money grubbing heads. Well assholes, look at your legacy:

Center for American Progress: The Top 100 Effects of Global Warming

Global Warming Wrecks All the Fun

Say Goodbye to French Wines
Say Goodbye to Light and Dry Wines
Say Goodbye to Pinot Noir
Say Goodbye to Baseball
Say Goodbye to Christmas Trees
Say Goodbye to the Beautiful Alaska Vacation
Say Goodbye to Fly Fishing
Say Goodbye to Ski Competitions
Say Goodbye to Ski Vacations
Say Hello to Really Tacky Fake Ski Vacations
Say Goodbye to That Snorkeling Vacation
Say Goodbye to That Tropical Island Vacation
Say Goodbye to Cool Cultural Landmarks
Say Goodbye to Salmon Dinners
Say Goodbye to Lobster Dinners
Say Goodbye to Discoveries of Sharks That Can Walk
Say Goodbye to Meadows of Wildflowers
Say Goodbye to Guacamole
Say Goodbye to Mixed Nuts
Say Goodbye to French Fries
Say Goodbye to Your Pretty Lawn
Say Hello to More Mosquitoes
Say Hello to Poison Ivy
Say Hello to Bulgarian Hooker Shortages

Global Warming Kills the Animals

Species Disappear
Cannibalistic Polar Bears…
…And Dying Polar Bears
More Bear Attacks
Dying Gray Whales
Death March of the Penguins
Farewell to Frogs
Farewell to the Arctic Fox
Farewell to the Walrus
Farewell to Cute Koala Bears
Jellyfish Attack
Giant Squid Attack
Homeless Sheep, Goats, and Bears
Homeless Deer and Marsh Rabbits
Gender-Bended Lizards
More Stray Kitties
Suffocating the Lemmings
Goodbye to Cod
Birds around the World
Birds on the Coast
Birds in your Backyard
Death to a Snail

Global Warming Kills the Planet

Greenland’s Melting
Less Ice in the Arctic
The Northwest Passage Becomes a Reality
Ice Shelf in Antarctica Bites the Dust
Ice Shelf in Canada Bites the Dust
Say Farewell to Glaciers
The Green, Green Grass of Antarctica
The Swiss Foothills
Giant “Sand Seas” in Africa
Florida’s National Marine Sanctuary in Trouble
The Oceans are Turning to Acid
Say Goodbye to the Great Barrier Reef
Mediterranean Sea? Try the Dead Sea.
A Sacred River Dries Up
Disappearing African Rivers
Suddenly Vanishing Lakes
Goodbye to the Mangrove Trees
Volcanoes Blow Their Tops
More Hurricanes
More Floods
More Fires
More Wildfires
Thunderstorms Get Dangerous
Higher Sea Levels
Burning Poo

Global Warming Makes Us Sicker

People Are Dying
Heat Waves and Strokes
Death by Smog
More Heart Attacks
More Mold and Ragweed = More Allergies, Asthma
A Resurgence In Deadly Disease
More Malaria in Africa
Malaria Spreading in Western Europe
Malaria Spreading in South America
Malaria Spreading in Russia
Spread of Dengue Fever
Death in the Time of Cholera
Spread of Lyme Disease
West Nile Virus Home Invasion

Global Warming Threatens Our National Security

IISS: “A Global Catastrophe” For International Security
U.N.: As Dangerous As War
Center for Naval Analyses: National Security Threat
Genocide in Sudan
War in Somalia
Starvation
Large-Scale Migrations
More Refugees
Increased Border Tensions
Famine
Droughts
The Poor Are Most at Risk
Your Checkbook
The World’s Checkbook

So the next time a dirty fucking hippy liberal dares to speak up about important issues, you - my conservative friend, should SHUT.THE.FUCK.UP!

Chris American Business, Bush, Climate, Conservatives, Republican, Right-Wing